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 Posted: Tue Dec 25, 2007 11:22 pm
so i was writing this wierd story, got about ten or twelve pages into it (size 12 print, mind you), but my comp crashed and i didn't have a backup saved anywhere. some of my best writing was in those ten or twelve pages, too. really really depressing.
anyway, though, it was this revenge story about a guy who finds out that a good friend of his has been involved in a car accident, and the other car just drives away without checking to see if she's okay. naturally, she dies en route to the hospital, and she was the kind of girl who never hurt anybody, the one who is sweet and nice and not in an overbearing or "i'm better than you" kind of way. so he rounds up a handful of his friends and they load up their weapons and start going around questioning people to try and find out if anybody knows anything.
anyway, it was going to end with them finding the other guy, and deciding not to kill him, you know, one of those stories with a moral, like "it's not what she would've wanted" type-a deal.
sound cliche?
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Posted: Tue Dec 25, 2007 11:55 pm
And thus you've learned the same hard lesson I have before: SAVE OFTEN. I've lost stuff just like that before and now days I save at least every page, usually more often than that, and with copies on hard drive and on a flash drive too commonly in case the computer dies on me or I lose the flash drive.
And the ending is a little cliche as is. Keep working at it though, you may get something out of it with some fiddling with it. Perhaps you can elaborate more on the particular nature of the crime, the culprit, and the victim to see how that should effect the outcome rather than just a generic "nice innocent victim wouldn't want me to hurt somebody for any reason in their name! Oh no!" You haven't said much about it right now, the circumstances of the crash or the characters in more depth, so you may not have done this, but just from the little blurb be sure you haven't made the victim the old stereotypical Perfect Mary Sue, the saintified girl who nobody wants to say or even remember anything less than what they consider ideal about her because she died, and a tragic death at that. Also, try not to make the villain too overly simple either is probably a good idea. Though depending on how you decide to do the main characters' end decision, having a just plain old through and through blatantly typically foul villain could serve a purpose.
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Posted: Wed Dec 26, 2007 12:13 am
What you've posted is a very bare outline that is indeed cliche. However, if you post bare outlines, all stories are cliche. Do your best to remeber at least some of what you wrote and rewrite it. Pain in the butt in my opinon, but I have stories I've been rewriting for over 10 years (too bad most of them are fanfics!)
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Posted: Wed Dec 26, 2007 8:43 am
err, forgive my very non-apologetic reply but somehow i applaud your PC for crashing. it not only heralded that you should end the crap of a story, it also suggests that you start a new one. one with a very different theme from your story. for starters, try reading ayn rand. no offense.
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Posted: Wed Dec 26, 2007 11:52 am
thank you for stabbing me in the heart. yeah, reading what i've got there so far, it doesn't sound that great. but it wasn't just a revenge story, it was also supposed to be a character study of how people deal with grief, handle death. you learn more about the characters and the dead girl's personality via flashbacks and stuff, each flashback sort of a memory in the minds of the characters who are still alive, and how they deal with the fact that their friend is gone.
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Posted: Wed Dec 26, 2007 11:52 pm
Then add that to the first post. But anyway, yeah, I think the ending decision is especially going to be important for deciding if the story is any good or crap. The "she wouldn't want me to do anything bad to you" thing is indeed cliche (and a cliche that doesn't deserve to be as popular as it is), but if you work on this it could be salvaged I think.
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Posted: Thu Dec 27, 2007 5:33 pm
haha yeah i totally just spaced putting that part into the first post. a revenge story is infinitely better if it's more than a revenge story. and i'm beginning to realize that the ending must be changed, too...i'm just having a little trouble getting there.
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Posted: Sun Dec 30, 2007 6:31 am
Seriously, I know how you feel. Losing your hardwork in a split second because the com crash down. At that moment, I really want to crush that com into pieces until it became a molecule.
It's a pain in the a s s to save every now and then especially when you are typing..but anyway..I read your 1st post..and find your story kinda dramatic..but still acceptable..
Why are you ending a revenge story with the person not killing the one who kills the girl?!
The climax totally went dull.
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Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 10:53 am
yeah that's a shitty climax i've realized. so instead i'm going to have it so that they find out in the end that the guy who swerved into the girl's lane, causing the accident, ended up dying about ten minutes later when his own car crashes. i like the irony of that. they've been searching for a dead man the whole time.
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Posted: Wed Jul 22, 2009 1:42 pm
dagny slug err, forgive my very non-apologetic reply but somehow i applaud your PC for crashing. it not only heralded that you should end the crap of a story, it also suggests that you start a new one. one with a very different theme from your story. for starters, try reading ayn rand. no offense. Ha ha - I love your sig -"don't let other people define who you are" I certainly hope our beginning author pays attention to this and not the comment. ninja For some simple things use google docs. It's easy to access and a crashing hard drive won't kill it. I write sometimes too and I do it more for me than for others. Some of the online adventures I've had are very good to write about. Flesh out the characters a bit. Try to show why they are acting the way they are. Let THEM speak through you.
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