Welcome to Gaia! ::

Yeah, it might sound comical, but sometimes I feel that way. The youth pastor in one of the churches I visited to used that term in one of his talks, he said that's a Christian who just comes in and out of Church, just appears during the service then disappears right after. Poof! here and poof! she's gone. It's sad for me 'cause I haven't really found a good youth group to be with after I stayed with my dad. (I used to live with a mom that was an Atheist. My mom despised that me, my sibs and my dad where Christians. When they divorced, I chose dad, and it was a good decision) Everytime I try to stay in one, it's like they're already a group, kinda like a click or something, and I feel somewhat depressed that I don't belong anywhere with my fellow Christians. Sure, they smile, they greet me, be nice, but then, they always go a hang around with themselves, you know what I mean? It sucks. As much as I want to be a fictional ninja throwing kunai knives and all, I just don't want to be one in church.

Okay, done ranting. *sighs*

I think I would be considered that kind of ninja Christian also lol... I began to follow Christ a little over two years ago, and ever since I've been church hoping? Been to different kinds of churches and although they were all nice and all, it didn't feel right being there. Right now I don't belong to a church, and I'm not really that active in finding one anyway (my fiance and I will be doing a lot of traveling soon so it wouldn't be worth it).

But there is one kind of ministry that I do love keeping track of online called the HeartCry ministry at illbehonest.com.... the first video that I saw was of Paul Washer with a a shocking message to the youth (you should watch it), and ever since then HeartCry has been the closest to being some kind of pastor to me, or just something to listen to or keep me focused... but most of the time I study the Bible with my fiance and his cousin and his cousin's wife and people in Gaia... fellowship is important, but it can come in different shapes and sizes lol.