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Phantomrider -A poem

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WhiterabbitSebastian

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PostPosted: Sun Mar 13, 2011 11:09 am


I got the idea for this one whle listening to Phantomrider by Tokio Hotel . With the help of bits and peices of the lyrics i was able to write this . Tell me what you think . And please be honest.


Phantomrider
Like a phantom rider
I leave tonight
To a far away place
Its so dark and cold
As I drive alone
I am dyeing tonight
Please don’t cry
You will make it on your own
I will be with you
But I am a phantomrider
And we always die on our own
So kiss me goodbye
We will see each other again
Now I leave for the light
I love you goodbye
I am a phantom rider
I will make it on my own.
PostPosted: Tue Mar 22, 2011 8:33 pm


Nice!! I wish I had time right now to look up the song you mentioned but I'm in a rush!! smile
It's good. For critique though I wouldn't title it phantomrider. Either that or don't use the word till late in the poem. It just seemed a bit repetative having it as title and then in the first line....that's it though!! smile

viper_353
Crew

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