Gorymdaith had made camp a couple of days walk outside of a Soquili community that was full of merchants and traders he often visited in his travels on his search for his mother. He'd managed to make a lean-to under a giant oak before the rain came, and the sound of the rain on the leaves above filled him with a hard-won calm he'd fought to claim. He took a deep inhale, filling his lungs with the smell of wet earth and still-blooming flowers. It was mid-Spring, and they were still sweet-smelling.
Gory hadn't always been so untroubled. He'd spent years wandering the Kawani lands on his own after his mother's sudden disappearance. He'd been a foal still when he awoke alone, confused and scared in their seaside home. That fear and confusion had turned and soured in him, becoming anger and guilt as he got older. Anger at being left so young, and guilt for feeling that way because he still did not know if her leaving had been her choice or not. Gorymdaith had been so conflicted over these feelings for so long, but he'd kept them buried when he'd interacted with others. It wasn't their fault, and he did not want to compound his current guilt with the guilt that would follow if he treated others badly. His mother had taught him better.
As an adult, he'd made friendships, and had brief companionships. But, he'd also come across another similar to him. It had turned out, they shared a sire. After years of loneliness, Gory had met his younger sister, Chwaer. With an amused snort and a small shake of his head, Gory smiled at the thought of her.
Chwaer had grown up not knowing their father like he had, but she'd been raised with her mother to adulthood. Chwaer was softer where he was jagged. She never held back a laugh or a smile, and was so at peace with herself. At first, Gory had been jealous of her care-free manner. He'd begun resenting her for it the more time he spent in her presence. But then a few days before Gory decided to head back out and continue his search, he'd found Chwaer by the stream not far from their camp, crying.
Confused, Gorymdaith approached his little sister. "
What ails you, Little One?", he asked, his voice almost so deep it could be mistaken for a rumble of thunder. She looked up at him surprised, and tried to recover, but her gentle voice still shook as she took a breath. She'd briefly thought about lying, but she'd found out her brother was rather intuitive. "
Why wasn't I good enough for him to stay for? Why didn't our father want me? Want us?". The tears filled her eyes again, and she couldn't help but shake with the force of the sobs she attempted to keep inside.
Gory gently laid down beside her, reaching over with his muzzle and closing his glowing eyes to brush his cheek against hers. He'd felt something in him soften at this, at seeing the same insecurity echoed in her that he'd held himself. The feelings of resentment and jealousy dissolved then, because they were more alike than he'd thought. Gory lowered his head as she buried her face against his mane and sobbed until she was out of tears. He had none to give anymore; he'd cried himself dry a long time ago, but he could be here for her.
When she'd finished, Gorymdaith and Chwaer had walked back to camp and eaten their dinner in companionable silence. The last few days of that first visit were spent with Gory finally learning how to have fun, and not take himself so seriously. They'd played in the stream like foals, and ran around laughing like hyenas as they played pranks on one another. They'd been robbed of spending this time together as foals, and now they were taking what time they had left making up for it.
The night before Gory was to head back on the road, he looked across the fire at his sister, a new appreciation for her blooming in his chest. He realized that he loved her dearly, and she was his
family. He finally had a part of something he'd yearned for for so long, it had gaped like an open wound. And now, that wound was healing. "
Can I come visit you again, Little One?", he almost whispered across the fire. When Chwaer's eyes met his, there was more than firelight in them. He saw the same sense of family he had, of the bond coming together that would never be severed. She smiled. "
Of course, Big Brother. You're always welcome where I am."
Gorymdaith had left the next morning after they'd said their goodbyes, his heart feeling heavy, but fuller than it had been in a long time. He'd felt a piece of something click in place in his heart, and while he was sad to leave her, he knew he had to continue on his search.
Chwaer wasn't the only meaningful relationship in his life, either. He'd had a brief relationship with a beguiling female who'd borne him a son and a daughter: Chryso and Morwr. While Chryso took mostly after his mother, Morwr was almost the spitting image of him. While Gory had loved his sister, his love for his children was bone-deep. Something so wild and unshakable that he would tear the world apart for them. He stayed with their mother until they were adults, and had set out on their own. Watching them grow and learn, and be a part of their lives was something Gory had wished he'd had.
He'd known he wasn't a perfect parent, but Gory wouldn't trade the time with his children for anything. The tears and fights were just as precious as the laughs and adventures and teaching moments. It was then that he had truly, fully appreciated that he now had what he'd longed for: a family. A family that he would never be parted from, no matter how much distance lay between them.
Morwr had set out to be a wanderer like he was. They'd traveled together for a time, but when his daughter decided she'd like to try it on her own, she went with his blessing. He'd been afraid for her, but so very proud of the somber young mare she was. She'd held herself with dignity and grace, and while she was usually of few words, she never had an unkind word. He could've drowned in his pride that filled him when he thought of his children.
His sister had helped begin that change within him, but it was becoming a parent that marked him so deeply and made him truly change as a soul. He would be forever grateful for knowing them all, and thankful for them for helping to change him.
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