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Maple Leaves (Please Critique)

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Mercuriael

PostPosted: Wed May 16, 2007 5:26 pm


Maple Leaves is a story about how your life can change drastically, but you still remain yourself.

The Hero and Heroine

Jake Reganore: He is 26, studying law. Jake witnessed his mother fall from a gun wound to the heart in her kitchen. He disagrees with his father, on the issue of who killed his mother. His fathers' suspect is Jake's older brother Brandon.

Lucille Brians: She is a 23 year old prodigy, graduating high school at age 16. She currently works a Psychiatrist. Lucille is a "member" of the Oculocutaneous albinism family, part of Oculocutaneous albinism type 2 (OCA2). She counsels Jake on his recent trauma.

The Story

Jake is working at a Law firm during his summer vacation. On his mothers whim, he goes to visit her on a Friday afternoon. Much to his shock, Jake steps into the door at the exact moment the gun is fired, and his mom falls into her own pool of blood. Traumitized and thrown into sucidal depression, Jake is sent to Dr. Lucille Brians. There, he confronts his fears about his moms death, the stresses that Jake's father is putting on him, and the doubts on whether his older brother Brandon actually pulled the trigger and forcefully took his mother away.

Dr. Brains slowly but surely helps Jake realize that it's okay to feel scared, and doubtful on the past actions. She helps Jake realize, that even though he's changed, he is still Jake Reganore.

But who killed Mrs. Reganore? Jake realizes more than he even wanted to know, and what can Dr. Brians do to prove the innocence
of Brandon?

So, what do you guys think? If you want more infomation on Lucille's Albinism, go to wikipedia. P
Please critique this, and does anyone like this story? If so, do you want me to post the chapters? If so, where do you want me to post them? If you want morer story information, Pm me.
PostPosted: Wed May 16, 2007 5:38 pm


Please excuse any spelling mistakes.
I am only human

Mercuriael


Dreamer Aura Laforest

PostPosted: Sun May 20, 2007 10:59 am


You see, the presentation of a story is as important as the story itself...
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Prose - Sentences And Paragraphs? That'll Go Here!

 
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